These kids will not remember me.

Before I get to explaining this title, let me say a few things...It has been a VERY long time since I have written. Longer than I remember. I hope to get back into writing regularly and sharing some of my journey over the last year and a half.

Both of my boys are playing Upward Basketball right now. My younger son's coach, at the Pre-K/K level, asked for an assistant. I volunteered. I just show up and help manage the kids and encourage them and stuff like that.

Last week, the head coach asked me to be in charge at practice because he had a meeting and wasn't sure if he would make it. Fortunately, Upward has practice plans spelled out for their coaches which is good because I am NOT a basketball coach.

We only had 5 kids that practice so we worked through the drills while I also tried to manage the kids. Like the one who stands still for 2 seconds and then starts spinning all over the place and then spins on the ground. Or even my own son who is messing around with his friend. At one point I was thinking: these kids probably think I'm the meanest coach ever. I stopped myself because I didn't feel like I was smiling at all. I didn't feel like my usual self trying to encourage them but just focused on accomplishing the drill. Now, of course, helping them accomplish the drill is the coach's job. But I'm not gifted at creative ways to hold their grab their attention. Like things that pre-school and kindergarten teachers do to keep the kids attention. I'm just not that person.

Anyway, we got through the end of practice and I tried to ramp up my efforts to encourage them in the last few minutes.

As a coach of many years, I want to make a difference in the lives of my players. I want to see long term impact. But I've spent the majority of my career coaching teenagers. They take in the life lessons and are able to apply them long term.

So why do I say these kids on this basketball team won't remember me? Because they won't. In five years, the likelihood of them remembering my name or having some lasting memory of me is not high. And that's fine. If coaching were about me and them remembering ME ( as opposed to the lessons they learned through sports) then I'm coaching for the wrong reasons. But after my attempt at being the head coach, it really got me thinking at this age what will they remember?

1. How they felt when they came to practice and games. Were they welcomed and made to feel important?

2. Whether they wanted to come back each week. How they feel and how they are treated will make an impact on whether they want to keep coming.

3. If they had fun. I'm confident that kids of all ages want to have fun on some level regardless of their skill.

The bottom line is at this age, I would rather be the assistant.

#coachforhisglory